Amid rumors of significant cost overruns, mounting delays, and venue changes, embattled USA Captain and Host Committee Chairman Brian "Goombay" Farley finally announced meager details about the 2020 Quaich early this morning. Rather than basking in the excitement of the announcement, Goombay faced questions about whether everything will be ready on time. The assembled media interrogated Goombay about the specific courses to be played, restaurants to be patronized and accommodation details. Shockingly, he was unable to provide answers beyond saying that more information will be forthcoming.
"It cannae be done," said a flustered Ian "Big Man" MacCallum of Team Scotland. "Goombay's all bum and parsley if he thinks we can do this with jus' nine months time!"
Members of the Quaich 2020 Host Committee are quietly talking about bringing in a proven operational leader to replace Goombay, who is a lawyer by training with no operational experience.
"I can't comment on this situation," said former USA Captain Eric "Swayze" Silagy, wearing a hard hat and military-grade sunglasses inside a hurricane command center in Riviera Beach, Florida. "But if it were me, I'd be staging equipment and hardening key Quaich venues right now."
The information as we know it today is as follows:
Where: Rosemary Beach, Florida. Connecting flights into Panama City, FL airport (20 minutes from Rosemary Beach) from a dozen cities in the U.S., including Atlanta, Charlotte, Dallas, Houston and many others. Additional airport options include Pensacola, FL (1.5 hour drive) Ft. Walton, FL (1 hour drive) and a few others.
When: Opening Dinner Wednesday, April 29, 2020. Closing Dinner Saturday, May 2. Departures the morning of Sunday, May 3. Accommodations will be available Tuesday, April 28, for those arriving early.
Golf: Practice rounds the morning of Wednesday, April 29. Official tournament begins on Thursday, April 30. Four tournament rounds (all with buggies): 18 holes Thursday, 36 holes Friday, 18 holes Saturday.
