A complaint from an anonymous whistleblower has drawn attention to an October 25 phone call between former Team USA player Bret "Fabric" Baier and current team captain Brian "Goombay" Farley, during which Fabric asked for reinstatement onto the team in exchange for an opportunity to play a future Quaich match round at the venerable Augusta National Golf Club in Augusta, Georgia.
"I am reporting an urgent concern," said the whistleblower in a letter to the Quaich Inspector General. "In the course of my official duties, I have received information from multiple Quaich officials that Fabric is using the power of his celebrity and connections to solicit interference in the 2020 Quaich matches."
Upon reading the whistleblower's complaint, Captain Farley quickly released the transcript of the October 25 call. He described it as a "perfect call" and demanded that the identity of the whistleblower be revealed.
MEMORANDUM OF TELEPHONE CONVERSATION
DECLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF THE CAPTAIN
Goombay: Congratulations on becoming a member of Augusta National and thank you for hosting me for a memorable round of golf there.
Fabric: Well it's very nice of you to say that. I will say that I do a lot for you. I spend a lot of effort and a lot of time. Much more than your Quaich buddies are doing and they should be helping you more than they are. Swayze does almost nothing for you. Did he get you on Augusta National? No. All he does is talk and I think it's something that you should really ask him about.
Goombay: Yes, you are absolutely right. I would like to thank you again for inviting me to play at Augusta and follow up on your offer to have the club host us for one round of the Quaich matches in May.
Fabric: I would like you to do me a favor though because I have been through a lot and you know a lot about it. Being removed from the team after 2012 wasn't right given my winning record. Not right at all. A lot of people are still talking about it. A lot of people want to see me back on the team.
Goombay: But that would mean kicking someone else off the team.
Fabric: That one guy, the chubby one with the Baffler and short back-swing, he's bad news. You'll do the right thing. Get back to me soon.
END OF CONVERSATION
END OF CONVERSATION
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| Bret "Fabric" Baier (2nd from left) and Brian "Goombay" Farley (3rd from left) on the Hogan Bridge at Augusta National Golf Club in October 2019 |
A special committee has been formed to examine the whistleblower complaint and witnesses are expected to be deposed in the next two weeks. With less than five months until the 2020 Quaich matches in Rosemary Beach, Florida, U.S. Captain Farley is calling for a quick resolution to this matter. "This is a hoax," said an exasperated Goombay. "No Captain in Quaich history has been treated like this."
